An American Classified

Wanted: A honest and hardworking, no nonsense candidate with fiscal discipline, a solid moral background and strong ethical convictions. Must be able to maintain a strong military, peaceful and friendly relations with our allies, and a sense of prosperity and equality for all our citizens.

We will provide a competitive salary, vacation time, healthcare for you and your immediate family and free housing and transportation.

Must be able to pass a full background check and drug screening. Experience not necessarily required, but comparable skills are preferred.

This is an Equal Opportunity offer, valid for all non-felon U.S. citizens, 35 years and older. Offer only good for one four year term, with one possible four year extension, and not valid with any other employment offers. See the United States Constitution for details, terms and limits.

To apply, simple fill out a FEC Form 2 with the government, send out petitions to be put on the States' ballots, and announce your candidacy and platform publicly. All serious bids (and a few not so serious ones) will be considered.

Please address all cares, comments or concerns to "We the People", c/o the United States of America.

Good Luck, and looking forward to hearing from you soon...